Misery

5th January 2009, 11.15am

Im at work now.Terrible start of the day. The moment i stepped into the office this morning.I got a awkward stares from the colleagues. I dunno what's worng and what's happening. I'm so miserable. All i could to respond to the stare is pretended like nothing happened. I'm always telling myself that there's only 3 more weeks left to stay in this company. I jus have to bare it and then i'll get my salary to get myself a new phone. Hope all these suffer is worth it. I've always wanted to buy a new phone since last year. But the plan was postponed due to my car accident compensation. This is the opportunity to make it a reality. So i have confifent in myself that i can go through it no matter what. To be honest with myself,i did not do anything wrong. i performed what i'm suppose to do. Though i'm only committing 4 days a week,but i've clearly stated that on my first day of work. You shouldn't have hire me if you're not happy with the condition in the beginning. I feel very bored working here. There's barely busy time for me. Time passses so slowly here. This is not the working opportunity i expect. Compared to the company i previously worked with, though this company has higher turnover,but i don't give a damn,it's none of my business. The previous company has ideal employer and i'm always busy with workloads until i skipped lunch sometimes. I like that kind of environment as time passes very fast. Unlike now, i feel myself being so useless in the company,waiting office hours to be over everyday.i hate working here..i went to sleep pretty early last night,and so sorry i did not answer your call. Though i know it might not be the words that i very much want to hear from you, but at least i can hear your voice to make me sleep soundly at night.people out there who always show concern to me, thanks for all your concerns, i'm glad that i have you guys, don't worry,i'm not being pessimist,i know that rejection is god's protection and i will learn how to accept it.